there was once a perfect gentleman whose whole household goods consisted of one bootjack and a comb. but he also had one of the most remarkable shirt collars in the world. i'll tell you a story about it.

when the shirt collar had passed his prime he turned his thoughts to marriage. in the fullness of time he went to the wash, and there he met with a garter.

"my!" said the collar, "anyone so slender, so tender, so neat and nice as you are, i never did see. may i know your name?"

"no," said the garter. "i won't tell you."

"then at least tell me where you live?" asked the collar.

but the garter was so modest that she couldn't bring herself to answer such an embarrassing question.

"i believe you are a girdle," said the collar. "a sort of underneath girdle. and i dare say you're as useful as you are beautiful, my pretty little dear."

"i forbid you to speak to me," said the garter. "i'm sure i haven't given you the slightest encouragement."

"your beauty is every encouragement," said the collar.

"kindly keep away from me," said the garter. "you look too masculine."

"oh, i'm a perfect gentleman," said the collar. "i've a bootjack and a comb to prove it."

this wasn't true at all, for they belonged to his master, but he liked to boast.

"please don't come so close," said the garter. "i'm not used to such behaviour."

"prude!" the collar called her as they took him from the washtub. they starched him, hung him over a chair back in the sun, and then stretched him out on an ironing board. there he met with a sadiron.

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作文地带知识拓展:

• 英语（English）属于印欧语系日耳曼语族西日耳曼语支，最早被中世纪的英国使用，并因其广阔的殖民地而成为世界使用面积最广的语言。英国人的祖先盎格鲁部落是后来迁移到大不列颠岛地区的日耳曼部落之一，称为英格兰。这两个名字都来自波罗地海半岛的Anglia。该语言与弗里斯兰语和下撒克森语密切相关，其词汇受到其他日耳曼语族语言的影响，尤其是北欧语（北日耳曼语），并在很大程度上由拉丁文和法文撰写。