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情人节必看英文版情感幽默

时间:2010-08-10来源:看英语栏目:语言文化作者:作文地带 英语作文收藏:收藏本文
JOKE 1 Wife talking to her husband (who reads newspaper all day): I wish I were a newspaper so I'll be in your hands all day. Husband: I wish that too, so I could change you daily. JOKE 2 A little boy asked his father: Daddy, how much does it cost to get

  JOKE 1
  Wife talking to her husband (who reads newspaper all day): I wish I were a newspaper so I'll be in your hands all day.

  Husband: I wish that too, so I could change you daily.

  JOKE 2
  A little boy asked his father: Daddy, how much does it cost to get married?

  The father replied: I don 't know son. I'm still paying!!

  JOKE 3
  At midnight father saw that his married son leaving home...

  He asks him: what are you doing?

  The son replied: Dad I am fed up with my life! My newly marriage is not going well, my wife and my mom keep fighting with each other! I have to pay bills for my in-laws, and I hate this life!!! I want to go far from here, I want to taste every joy of life, and I want to have every fun of life!!!

  Father said: Wait!!!!!!!! I am coming with you.

  JOKE 4
  A woman goes to England to attend a 2-week company training session. Her husband drives her to the airport and wishes her to have a good trip.

  The wife answered: Thank you honey, what would you like me to bring for you?

  The husband laughed and said: An English girl!!!

  The woman kept quiet and left. Two weeks later he picked her up in the airport and asked: So honey, how was the trip?

  The wife: Very good, thank you.

  The husband: And, what happened to my present?

  The wife: Which present?

  The husband: What I asked for: the English girl?

  The wife: Oh, that! Well, I did what I could; now we have to wait a few months to see if it's a girl!!!

  JOKE 5
  A couple goes to an art gallery. They find a picture of a naked woman with only her privates covered with leaves. The wife doesn't like it and moves on, but the husband keeps looking. The wife asks, "What are you waiting for? " The husband replies, "autumn."

  JOKE 6
  A couple drove several miles down a country road with intense silence. Not a word was said to each other. An earlier discussion had led to an argument and neither wanted to concede his position. As they passed a barnyard of mules(骡子) and pigs, the wife sarcastically asked, "Relatives of yours? " "Yep, " the husband replied, "inlaws ".

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