When you meet people for the first time it’s always nice to make eye contact and smile. It’s a simple courtesy and leads to a relaxed conversation. If you tend to be a shy person, this may be somewhat difficult for you. You may tend to look down or away when greeting someone. This can break the conversation right away.

　　In his book, How To Connect In Business In 90 Seconds Or Less, Nicholas Boothman offers a really simple solution to the problem. When you meet or greet someone for the first time, just make a mental note of their eye color. This simple technique is amazingly effective. If you are looking for their eye color you’ll automatically make eye contact for a second or two.

　　I have found this works well one on one and is also effective in small groups. It really helps build rapport when giving a speech or presentation as it lets the audience member know that you are paying attention to them.

　　I speak quite often to groups of 10-20 people in Toastmasters. When I use this technique to make eye contact as I scan the room, I pause just long enough to build rapport with each audience member.

　　When you first try this you may find yourself saying blue, green, brown, etc in your mind, but you’ll find it soon becomes natural and is an easy habit to develop. It’s a simple exercise but you’ll notice the difference right away.

　　Try it in your next small group speech or presentation. Instead of an impersonal gaze over the room, if you make eye contact, you’ll find that you’ll build almost instant rapport with your audience. They will pay better attention to what you are saying and it may keep them awake after that long lunch.

　　当你第一次和别人见面时，保持目光接触和微笑总是令人愉快的。这是一个基本的礼貌，这样能够引向轻松的谈话。如果你是一个倾向于害羞的人，这对你可能有点困难。当欢迎某人时，你可能倾向于低头看或转移目光。这样做会马上砸了谈话。

　　尼古拉斯-布士曼在他《如何在90秒内进行商业联系》一书中，提供了一个这个难题的相当简单的解决方案：当你第一次会见或欢迎某人时，只是记住他们眼睛的颜色。这个简单的方法惊人地有效，如果在看他们眼睛的颜色时，你将会自动地和他们保持一两秒钟的目光接触

　　我发现这一方法在两个人时很成功，对小群体谈话同样有效。当做演讲或报告时它真有助于建立融洽的关系，因为这一方法使观众知道你在关注他们。

　　我十分经常在10到20人的群体中担当主持人，当我借环视整个房间时用这个方法和观众进行目光接触，直到和每位观众建立足够融洽的关系才停止。

　　当你初次尝试这个方法时，你可能会感觉你在心里念叨着蓝的、绿的、黄的等等颜色，但你会发现它变得很自然，并且是一个很容易养成的习惯。它是一个简单的训练，但是你很快体会到它的与众不同。

　　在你下一次小组演讲或报告试试它吧！如果你和观众保持目光接触而不是冷漠地瞪着房间，你会发现你几乎是在一瞬间内和观众建立起了融洽的关系。观众会更好的专注于你所说的，同时这又能让观众长时间保持清醒。