英文

My wife-to-be and I were at the county clerk's office for our marriage license. After recording the vital information -- names, dates of birth, etc. -- the clerk handed me our license and deadpanned, "No refunds, no exchanges, no warranties." 我和未婚妻在县办公室领结...

英文 英文笑话

I realized the impact of computers on my young son one evening when there was a dramatic sunset. Pointing to the western sky, David said, "I wish we could click and save that!" 一天傍晚，当我和年幼的儿子看到一个很漂亮的日落时，我意识到电脑对我儿子的影响是多么的深。 我儿子David指...

英文 英文笑话

Jim, my 40-something husband, was playing basketball with friends his age. "Pretty soon," said one of his teammates, "we'll have to count it as a basket if the ball just hits the rim." "Yeah," Jim agreed. "It's scary when you have to look through the bott...

英文 双语 英文笑话

Our family was dazzled by the sights and the bustling crowds during a visit to Manhattan. "This is the city that never sleeps," I told my eleven-year-old daughter. "That's probably because there's a Starbucks on every corner," she observed. 一次，在曼哈顿参观，看着高楼...

英文 英文笑话

I was bending over to wipe up a spill on the kitchen floor when my wife walked into the room behind me. "See anything you like?" I asked suggestively. "Yeah," she said. "You doing housework." （那次）我正在厨房里弯腰去擦洒在地板上的东西，这时，我妻子我身后进来了。“看到有什么你...

英文 双语 英文笑话

The sentence in the Thanksgiving edition of my church bulletin intended to say "Thank you, Lord, for the many miracles we are too blind to see." But in what might have been a classic Freudian slip, the sentence read "Thank you, Lord, for the many miracles...

英文 英文笑话

The son of a friend graduated from high school, so I sent a card to congratulate him. I enclosed money and scribbled some words of wisdom inside. He sent me a note back saying, "Thank you for the gift. Also thank you for the advice. My mom always told me ...

英文 英文笑话

Life after Death 死后重生 " Do you believe in life after death?" the boss asked one of his employees. "Yes, Sir." the new recruit replied. " Well, then, that makes everything just fine," the boss went on. " After you left early yesterday to go to your grandmo...

英文 英文笑话

One of my students could not take my college seminar final exam because of a funeral. No problem, I told him. Make it up the following week. That week came, and again he couldn't take the test due to another funeral. "You'll have to take the test early ne...

英文 英文笑话

There I was, my first day On the Job as a receptionist, handling one phone call after another like an old pro, when an employee stopped by my desk. "Have you ever done this before?" she asked. "No," I said. "Thought not. You just told that caller, `The pe...

英文 双语 英文笑话