Rodents had overrun a posh private school near New York City. So the headmaster, a friend of mine, asked a health inspector to deliver a slide presentation to teachers and students, showing how to remedy the situation, i.e., stow trash, no food in class, ...
"Doctor," she said loudly, bouncing into the room, "I want you to say frankly what's wrong with me." He surveyed her from head to foot. "Madam," he said at length, "I've just three things to tell you. First, your weight wants reducing by nearly fifty poun...
Dear white, something you got to know 亲爱的白种人,有几件事你必须知道。 When I was born, I was black. 当我出生时,我是黑色的 When I grow up, I am black. 我长大了,我是黑色的 When I'm under the sun, I'm black. 我在阳光下,我是黑色的 When I'm cold, I'm black. 我寒冷时,我是黑色的...
Everybody on earth dies and goes to heaven. God comes and says "I want the men to make two lines. One line for the men that dominated their women on earth and the other line for the men that were whipped by their women. Also, I want all the women to go wi...
As a rookie in the Atlantic City, N.J., Police department, I was assigned a beat on the boardwalk. Hardly a day went by when I didn't come upon a child who had become separated from his parents. One afternoon, I spotted a small boy standing alone, obvious...
One day a lady saw a mouse running across her kitchen floor. She was very afraid of mouse, so she ran out of the house, got into a bus and went to the shops. There she bought a mousetrap. The shopkeeper said to her, "Put some cheese in it and you will soo...
After being with her all evening, the man couldn't take another minute with his blind date. Earlier, he had secretly arranged to have a friend call him to the phone so he would have an excuse to leave. When he returned to the table, he lowered his eyes, p...
Sammy prayed every night for two weeks, asking God for $100. When he got no response, he thought it would be a good idea to write to God and see if that worked. The post office received the letter addressed to “God, Los Angeles.” They decided that it woul...
Mr. Robinson had to travel somewhere on business, and as he was in a hurry, he decided to go by air. He liked sitting beside a window when he was flying, so when he got on to the plane, he looked for a window seat. He found all of them had already had bee...
While proudly showing off his new apartment to friends, a college student led the way into the den. "What is the big brass gong and hammer for?" one of his friends asked. "That is the talking clock," the man replied. "How's it work?" "Watch," the man said...
英语应用文写作之留学申请信范文九篇(Application for Admittance) 留学和奖学金申请信中须写明下列几点: ...
2011高考英语作文广东卷真题范文及点评 : 写作(共两节,满分40分) 第一节 基础写作(共1小题,满分15分) 你校学...
2011高考英语作文江西卷真题范文及点评 : 假设你是星光中学的李华,将参加主题为Lets Ride Bicycles的英语演讲...
2011高考英语作文真题四川卷范文及点评 : 最近某中学生英文报开设了After-class Activities的栏目,请你根据以...
2011年高考英语作文之浙江卷 假设你是高中生李越,有感于校园中存在的随意涂写(toscribble)和乱丢垃圾(tolitt...
2011年高考英语作文之山东卷 假设你是李华,你的美国朋友Tom上个月来到北京学习。七月份你将去北京参加暑期中学...