There I was, my first day On the Job as a receptionist, handling one phone call after another like an old pro, when an employee stopped by my desk. "Have you ever done this before?" she asked. "No," I said. "Thought not. You just told that caller, `The pe...

英文 双语 英文笑话

As a new federal employee, I felt a combination of excitement and anxiety about meeting the strict standards of discretion and respect that our government imposes on its workers. Fearful of making a costly mistake, I decided to read up on procedures and s...

英文 英文笑话

Rodents had overrun a posh private school near New York City. So the headmaster, a friend of mine, asked a health inspector to deliver a slide presentation to teachers and students, showing how to remedy the situation, i.e., stow trash, no food in class, ...

英文 双语 英文笑话

Shortly after graduating from veterinary school, I rode with my mother in the Michigan Trail Riders' annual trek across state. Late one afternoon, I was summoned to look at a horse that had reared up and flipped over in his trailer. Fortunately the horse ...

英文 英文笑话

Wondering why my niece, Charlotte, was returning to college to get a master's in philosophy, I asked, "What can you do with a degree like that?" "Well," she explained, "it will qualify me to deal with questions like, 'What is existence?' 'What is the esse...

英文 英文笑话

After my wife landed a coveted job offer from DHL, we went out of town to celebrate. While on our trip, she was contacted by the company's human resources department with an urgent request to complete and send back her tax forms. "No problem," she said. "...

英文 英文笑话

Being the office supervisor, I had to have a word with a new employee who never arrived at work on time. I explained that her tardiness was unacceptable and that other employees had noticed that she was walking in late every day. After listening to my com...

英文 英文笑话

Freelance newspaper writers don't get nearly as much attention as writers with regular bylines. So I was delighted when I finally got some notice. It was at the bank, and I was depositing a stack of checks. "Wow," said the teller, reading off the names of...

英文 英文笑话

I'm a high school geometry teacher and I started one lesson on triangles by reading a theorem. "If an angle is an exterior angle of a triangle, then its measure is greater than the measure of either of its corresponding remote interior angles." I noticed ...

英文 英文笑话

Corporate managers are always a good source of memorable quotes. Here are some examples of mediocrity rising to the top: "As of tomorrow, employees will only be able to access the building using individual security cards. Pictures will be taken next Wedne...

英文 英文笑话