A cop spotted a woman driving and knitting at the same time. Coming up beside her, he said, Pull over! No, she replied, a pair of socks! 巡警发现一名妇女边开车边织毛衣，便开车上前，说：靠边停车(套头衫...
Pete: The last time I was out hunting, I stepped off a high cliff, and would you believe it, while I was falling every fool deed Id ever done came into my mind. Bob: Must have been a pretty high mount...
The female dormitory will be out-of-bounds for all male students and vice versa. Anybody caught breaking this rule will be fined $20 the first time. Anybody caught breaking this rule the 2nd time will...
A man sat at a bar, had the saddest hangdog expression. Bartender: Whats the matter? Are you having troubles with your wife? The man: We had a fight, and she told me that she wasnt going to speak to m...
In an entrance examination of a conservatory of music, a teacher asked one of the boys, What is the most important physiological quality of a musician? To be deaf, replied the boy. Nonsense! said the ...
Looking very unhappy, a poor man entered a doctors consulting-room. Doctor, he said, you must help me. I swallowed a penny about a month ago. Good heavens, man! said the doctor. Why have you waited so...
A father was trying to teach his son the evils of alcohol. He put one worm in a glass of water and another worm in a glass of whiskey. The worm in the water lived, while the one in the whiskey curled ...
A guy goes to visit his grandma and he brings his friend with him. While hes talking to his grandma, his friend starts eating the peanuts on the coffee table, and finishes them off. As theyre leaving,...
Finding one of her students making faces at others on the playground, Ms Smith stopped to gently reprimand the child. Smiling sweetly, the Sunday school teacher said, Bobby, when I was a child I was t...
I can always tell a graduate class from an undergraduate class, said an instructor at a university graduate engineering course. When I say Good afternoon, the undergraduates respond Good afternoon. Bu...
