EarlyRetirement To:All Staff Cc: From:Management RE:Early Retirement Due to our current financial situation, management has decided to implement a scheme to put all workers over 30 on early retirement. This scheme will be know as RAPE (Retire Aged Personn...

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IfGodwasawoman笑话 IF GOD WAS A WOMAN... 1. Sex would smell like chocolate. 2. Farts would smell like roses. 3. Dogs would smell spring fresh. 4. Babies would come from vending machines. 5. Men would be born with a permanent erection. 6. All women would hav...

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Vegetable笑话 One day two carrots were walking down the street. They were the best of friends. Just as they started to step off the curb, a car sped around the corner and ran one of them over. The uninjured carrot cradled his buddy, telling him over and ove...

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Guysfavouritething What's a guys favourite thing to eat? His girlfriend....

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Gotanyweed笑话 A stoner walks into a gas station and asks the dude at the counter, "Got any weed?" The man politely replied, "Um, no sir. We do not sell marijuana here." So he left. The same guy comes back the next day and says, "Got any weed?" The man behi...

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AfricanorIndian笑话 A jeweler watched as a huge truck pulled up in front of his store. The back came down and an elephant walked out. It broke one of the windows with its tusk and then, using its trunk like a vacuum cleaner sucked up all of the jewelry. The...

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Gas station TV Gas Station TV says they will install television sets at five hundred gas stations and broadcast to motorists filling up their gas tanks. Imagine the programming. It's the perfect place to watch Debbie Does Dallas while Exxon does you....

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Sleepy captain When you're on reserve with an airline, you fly when they tell you to fly. Being unable to be contacted is a lesser offense than refusing or missing an assigned trip. This captain gets an A for his creativity in avoiding an assignment. When...

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Mom Im gay A young man, in the course of his college life, came to terms with his homosexuality and decided to come out of the closet. His plan was to tell his mother first, so on his next home visit, he went to the kitchen, where his mother was busying h...

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Sneak in & out The big news of the day is that President Bush made his second surprise visit to Baghdad... he flew in and out. ...He did sneak in. It worked so well that they now have a secret plan to sneak a guy in and out of Condoleezza Rice....

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