Smart-ass笑话 A high school English teacher reminds her class of tomorrow's final exam. "Now class, I won't tolerate any excuses for you not being there tomorrow. I might consider a nuclear attack or a serious personal injury or illness, or a death in your ...

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Gethard笑话 What did the egg say to the boiling water? How am I suppose to get hard... I just got laid 10 minutes ago!...

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How to have sex A man walked up to a farmer's house, and knocked on the door. When the farmer's wife opened the door, the man asked if she knew how to have sex. Not amused, she slammed the door. Again, the man knocked, and again, he asked the same questio...

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Womans boobs A young boy asks his father, Dad, is it ok for us guys to notice all the different kind of boobs? Surprised, the father answers, Well, sure son, we wouldn't be normal if we didn't... there are all kinds of breasts. Depending on a woman's age,...

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Circumvention笑话 Today at a press conference, President Bush defended his domestic wiretapping program when a reporter called it a circumvention of the law. The president said 'That's ridiculous. I had my circumvention done when I was a baby.'...

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Youwouldlooknicer笑话 "How did you lose your job at the dress shop?" a woman asked her friend. "Well, after trying on about 25 dresses, the customer said to me, 'I think I would look nicer in something flowing.' "And I suggested the Mississippi."...

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Hewasmistaken笑话 Two guys were walking down the street and the first guy glanced at a girl who was walking by. She turned around and said indignantly, "What are you looking at?" The second guy pointed to his friend and said, "He thought you were good looki...

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TorturedbyDick笑话 While President Bush was spending the holidays at his Texas ranch, he was clearing brush and a branch cut his face. As a result the tree was cut down and tortured by Dick Cheney. -Conan O'Brien...

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Quarantine A man and his wife are returning from holiday, while on holiday they decided to buy themselves some pets, he bought a snake while the woman got a skunk. As they are passing through airport control they notice a sign which says NO ANIMALS WILL B...

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Duel In bygone days, a thin man insulted a large man. The large man challenged his tormentor to a duel with pistols. On the day of the duel a debate ensued about the unfair advantage held by the thin man because he was a much smaller target. Finally the t...

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