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Relationship secrets 1. It's important to have a woman who helps at home, who cooks from time to time, cleans up and has a job. 2. It's important to have a woman who can make you laugh. 3. It's important to have a woman who you can trust and who doesn't l...

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Swearing parrot There's this fella with a parrot. And this parrot swears like an old salt, I mean he's a pistol. He can swear for five minutes straight without repeating himself. Trouble is, the guy who owns him is a quiet, conservative type, and the bird...

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Size of a mans... A woman sought the advice of a sex therapist, confiding that she found it increasingly difficult to find a man who could satisfy her, and that it was very wearisome getting in and out of all these short term relationships. Isn't there so...

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Cucumer Penis Olive A kid goes into his moms room and finds her jumping vigorously on top of his dad. He asks: What are you doing to dad, mom? She says: I'm helping him exercise to lose weight! Oh mom, that is worthless you jump on top of him to make him ...

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Little Johnny Little Johnny's Christmas Little Johnny had a cussing problem and his father was getting tired of it. He decided to ask his shrink what to do. The shrink said, Since Christmas is coming up, you should ask Johnny what he wants Santa to bring ...

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Sperm Bank A man walks into a sperm bank wearing a ski mask and carrying a gun, he demands that the woman at the counter take it out. We have no money sir, this is a sperm bank, she replies. I don't care says the robber, take it out and drink it down!, he...

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Ultimate fantasy In a recent On-line poll 38,562 men across the US were asked to identify woman's ultimate fantasy. 97.8% of the respondents said that a woman's ultimate fantasy is to have two men at once. While this has been verified by a recent sociolog...

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Hard times Harry and his wife are having hard financial times, so they decide she'll become a hooker. She's not quite sure what to do, so Harry says, Stand in front of that bar and pick up a guy. Tell him a hundred bucks. If you've got a question, I'll be...

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My daughter Darla A woman takes her 16-year-old daughter to the doctor. The doctor says, Okay, Mrs. Jones, whats the problem? The mother says, Its my daughter Darla, she keeps getting these cravings, shes putting on weight and is sick most mornings. The d...

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The Neighbor A man answers the door after he hears a knock. It is his next door neighbor holding a notebook. Want to participate in an orgy? he asks. Who is going to be there? the man replies. Well, it's you, me and your wife. I dont think so! he exclaims...

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